My Problem with the Word “Love”

Happy Valentine’s Day, (and Gal-entine’s day, too)! The title of this post is definitely dramatized for shock value but there is a lot of truth behind it. My problem is not necessarily with the word “love,” it’s more about the way we use it in a one-size-fits-all fashion. Specifically when “love” is inserted into a motivational quote or intention: for example, “do what you love”. Although true, the statement is so ambiguous it’s hard to make use of. As yesterday’s post pointed out, I’m feeling quite literal this week so I thought I’d share some practical uses to the every day sayings that have been around for years.


You can do it.

True, you can, but simply thinking that you can do it is where so many people go wrong in the name of manifestation. To tell yourself you can do something is one thing, to believe that you can changes the game entirely. To believe you can you must remove the blocks, lift the veil, start with the inner work and then put your thoughts to action.

Live your passion.

Give yourself permission to release the need to find a passion. A dogmatic statement like the one above can make the passionless feel like failures and the passion-driven feel immense societal pressure. Passion is a strong word and should be used sparingly. Instead, live your present: dive deep into your day and your experiences. Release the need for passion and just be. When you are present in your experiences, you will find a deeper feeling of satisfaction and understanding. Author Elizabeth Gilbert lays it out best right here.

Love over fear.

Love over fear is manifestation in action. The moments that call for this sentiment are the ones that help expand your trust in yourself and in the energy around you. When you choose “love” you release a limiting belief that has held you back in the past. You go forward despite being scared because you know deep down that a better option is around the corner and you are deserving of it.

Dream big.

This is a great sentiment and it sounds good, but to use this mantra as a helpful tool you have to define what “big” means to you. Think about it, walk it out, let it marinate. Once you’ve grasped your hands around “big,” then add that to your manifestation list. (next step: re-read the “you can do it” practicals and get to work.)

You can’t love someone, until you love yourself.

This is the one. This is it. Embrace the imperfect, ease around the edges, lean into yourself and there you will find your love.

Just as I wrote that it’s important to define “big” for yourself, you also have to look a bit deeper at that four letter “L” word. What does love mean to you? How do you see recognize it in action? How do you let it develop throughout your day?

This post is all about shedding light on the ambiguous. These are statements we’ve been told since we were kids, they are familiar and they can be useful tools if you take the time to understand them a bit deeper than at face value.

This is what these words mean to me, what do they mean to you?

I hope you have a great a Valentine’s Day and find some time to nurture your relationship with self, your relationship with others and your relationship to the ambiguous words.

Love (yes I mean it),

Holly