As mindful gals most of the time we can look at a situation through a reasonable lens and decipher between importance and insignificance. Yet, those little things throughout the day still bother us, still make us mull, and still from time to time get our lulus all up in a bunch.
I was talking with a friend last week about her social media feeds. She, as many of us do, uses her social media to follow along with her hobbies and interests, to inspire and engage her creativity. Yet, she was frustrated by the fact that her feed was filled with obligatory follows of acquaintances. She was worried about unfollowing because she didn’t want to cause drama or hurt people’s feelings.
Cue the eye-roll and “first world problems” hashtag. I know. However, my guess is at some point you’ve been here, where your polite and friendly tendencies overshadow what you actually want. This happens in real life, and now that we are in the digital age, it transfers over to our screen life as well.
As my friend and I chatted, my first response to her was “eff it.” If it would have been my own dilemma and the feelings of my acquaintances I may have thought about it a little more, but still I think I would have come to the same conclusion.
If we do something we have to do, or yes, follow someone we feel like we should just to be nice, it is inauthentic. It wastes our energy on things that aren’t feeding us: meaning politeness, although important, is not always what serves you best. Keeping a person on your feed just for the nice of it, leaves less room for the things you want to see that bring you joy, and, if we aren’t using social media to bring more joy into our lives than we really shouldn’t use it all.
And so, just as the Queen of “goop,” Gwyneth Paltrow gave notice to the modern divorce term “conscious uncoupling,” I give you the social media principle to live by anytime your politeness takes over, “authentic unfollowing.” Take the drama out of the screen, plain and simple, do what you want. Follow authentically, unfollow gracefully and once you’ve gotten a little piece of joy from your 10 minute scroll sesh, go out into the real world and share it.
Happy authentic unfollowing!